Red against the Green
by paradoxKitten
Summary: Zim returns to earth after being abandoned by the Irken Empire. He find that he has a lot more in common with Dib than he originally thought. ZaDR in later chapters
1. Prologue

A/N: Well this is my first ever (published) fanfiction. Writing has never been my specialty. I never got higher than a 'C' on short-stories/essays in school. I did my best though!

I've had this idea bugging me a while. Art just wasn't enough to express it. I'm not sure where this story is heading but it will stay safe for work, I promise. It will be ZADF until the last few chapters since neither character is the type to jump into a relationship. Also the first 8 chapters have been prewritten, so I apologise if my writting style suddenly changes.

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Prologue:

It was an ordinary evening for Dib. He looked around his room and collected the essential gear for breaking into his enemies base. Black clothing, a mask, some cameras. Not that his break-ins ever worked in his favor, it was just a routine for them these days.

He headed over to the aliens hideout, easily slipping through the gaps in security. He was about to sneak in when the front door opened. A derpy looking dog stood there waving.

"Well, hi there!" Dib smiled, about to ask if Zim was home. Before he could the little green dog called out "I'm going out for tacossss!" with a high-pitched squeal. Without another word the dog ran down the street, a leash trailing behind him. Zim wouldn't be happy about that.

Dib took the opportunity to enter, not bothering to close the door behind him. He approached the out-of-place toilet intending on snooping through the alien's research down below. Before he could be transported to the lower levels by the bizarre elevator he heard footsteps in the front room.

Dib peered out the kitchen door and saw Zim removing his wig and contacts before standing in front of the monkey portrait above the couch. The portrait picture changed to static for a few seconds before focusing in on two green skinned beings.

"Greetings, my Tallest. I have thought of a brilliant new plan to prepare this planet for the Armada."

The two aliens looked at each other, both holding some kind of sugary snacks. The purple eyed one turned back to Zim.

"Now isn't the best time, Zim. Go bother someone else."

Zim didn't notice the dismissal and pushed further.

"I plan to take all the planets water. The humans require it and will have to come begging me to help them. They will grow weak and be easy to control."

The two tall ones were growing impatient.

"That's, uh, great Zim. Tell us when your plan succeeds."

"I have devised a fool-proof plan. Would you like to see?" he said pulling out a rolled up parchment.

"Zim. Stop."

"I have blue prints for a machine capable of sucking up the entire earths oceans and turning it to steam. First I will make a small model and test on the lakes in this pig brained town. The humans will-"

"ENOUGH!" both the red and purple eyed aliens yelled in unison.

"Zim, you aren't an invader. You never will be. Just stop."

"I don't understand, Tallest Red. You are talking to Invader Zim, remember. Sent to prepare the human race for-"

"No! Zim, we sent you there to get rid of you. We didn't plan on you even reaching earth" Tallest Red cut Zim off with a bored expression.

"But I...but what about my Invading skills?" The smaller alien looked confused.

"Skills? You wiped out half of your own race! You killed Tallest Miyuki! Why would you think you're even wanted here?"

Zim was speechless for once.

"Stop calling us Zim. We don't care what you're doing anymore. We only ever checked in on you because we were amused by your pathetic attempts at invading."

With that, the transmission ended.

Zim stood there and Dib hesitated. It would be weird to comfort your enemy. Zim stared blankly at the monkey portrait. He looked utterly defeated.

Dib should have used this moment to his advantage. The (not so) invader was unprepared and defenseless. Unfortunately, Dib was only human. He wouldn't feel right about attacking Zim like this.

He stepped out from behind the door.

"Zim...?"

Zim snapped his head towards the kitchen. Hatred and confusion in his eyes. Dib took a few steps toward him. Suddenly, the alien hissed.

"Get out."

Dib didn't move, just looked uncertainly towards the open door then back at him with sympathy.

Zim snapped. He didn't want pity from a human. Especially not Dib. He was confused, hurt and embarrassed that his enemy saw him in the most humiliating moment of his life. His PAK legs shot out and he towered over the boy. "Computer! Remove the intruder!"

Before Dib could move, robotic arms seized him.

"Zim! Wait, please!"

Dib didn't know what he was trying to stall for. There wasn't anything he could do to make this better and he knew Zim would never accept the help anyway.

Zim stepped back as the robotic arms threw him out. Dib looked back before the door slammed shut. He didn't miss the look of despair on Zims face. He stood and brushed himself off. Should he go back in? Surely the alien wouldn't be planning world domination tonight. One last look at the base and Dib headed home. He would have to confront Zim at skool tomorrow.

Well the next day came and went but Zim never showed. In fact, he didn't return to skool again.


	2. Chapter 1: Reunion

_**Chapter 1: Reunion**_

Dib kept his head down as he took his seat in History class. The class was full of people who despised his very existence. He was seated at the front of the class, right by the window. He was grateful for this as the sky was his escape from reality.

It had been nearly five years since he had seen Zim. A few days after their last meeting he returned to Zim's base only to find an empty plot of land. It only took a few months for everyone to forget Zim ever existed. As the years went by he began to think that maybe they were right and the alien was only in his head.

His first day of hi-skool was hard. Students had to introduce themselves and give a quick idea of what they were interested in. Dib, of course rambled on about aliens and ghosts and his dream to be a paranormal investigator. He had been beaten up that lunch for being the 'weird kid'. He quickly learnt that making himself stand out only led to pain. He rarely spoke at all these days.

Life a home was hard too. He saw his dad less than when he was a kid. Gaz had a fierce temper and blamed Dib for everything. They got along worse than they used to. If she hated him back then, she loathed him now.

His thoughts were interrupted by the teacher entering, followed by a new student. The boy stood at the front of the class.

Dibs jaw dropped. It was Zim! Wait, no. It couldn't be. This kid was human. There was nothing other than the way this boy held himself and the pointed hair that seemed Zim-like.

The boy made eye contact with him. Was that recognition in his blue-grey eyes? Dib jumped up. Everyone looked from the new kid to Dib and snickered. Dib realised even if he was right, he was still acting out of the ordinary. He sat down again.

"We have a new student. This is Arik." he motioned to the black-haired boy with a dark red coat beside him. The boy didn't say anything and the teacher was eager to get class started. He skipped formal introductions and pointed to an empty desk at the other end of the front row.

"You can sit there for now."

The boy slid over to the desk like a cat and sat down without a word.

Dib continued to stare even when the boy made eye contact with him.

How could Zim be back? Why is he human? Is he back to destroy earth?

The idea that he might be the sole protector of earth made him smile. He hadn't had much of a life purpose since the invader left. Thinking back to that day in the lab made him frown again. What could Zim have been doing all this time? The other boy finally broke their staring contest and looked at the clock.

Crap.

What must this kid be thinking if he isn't Zim? Dib had been staring at him for longer than socially acceptable with randomly changing facial expressions. No wonder people call him a freak. That thought snapped Dib out of it and he turned back to look at the cloudy sky.

...

The day passed and Dib was thinking he must be wrong about Arik's identity. After all, he hadn't spoken to Dib yet and he didn't think Zim could get through a full day without making a scene. The bell that signals home time rang and he collected his books to leave. He stepped out the main doors into the cold. It had begun raining sometime during that last class so puddles covered most of the school grounds. Dib was about to leave when he noticed the new kid twenty or so yards away. He was standing under shelter with an annoyed look on his face. Dib saw him cringe when a drop of water fell from the roof onto his face.

That confirmed it. He HAD to be Zim. No one else reacted that way to a drop of water. Dib didn't stop to consider how awkward this would be if he was wrong. He figured he'd cross that bridge if he came to it.

He walked up to the boy and stood beside him. The new kid didn't acknowledge him so Dib announced his presence.

"Why did you come back?"

After a brief moment with no response Dib thought he hadn't heard. He was about to speak again when he got a response.

"I had no where else to go."

The boy said, staring out into the rain. They stood like this for a few minutes before Dib reached into his bag.

He pulled out an umbrella and held it out. The boy finally turned to look at him with a quizzical expression.

"What is the meaning of this?" he spoke.

Dib shrugged. What was the meaning behind it? He wasn't sure himself. So he just replied

"The rain never hurt anybody." And with a sly grin, he headed home in the rain.

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A/N: I chose Árik because I wanted a four letter name that sounded IZ-like. It can mean both 'Lonely'and 'ruler' so it seemed fitting


	3. Chapter 2: Sick

A/N: Posting two chapters tonight since they are both pretty short

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Chapter 2: Sick

Dib woke up the next morning feeling groggy. Walking home in the rain wasn't the brightest idea. So much for rain being harmless, he thought.

His throat was scratchy. This was always the first stage of a cold. Usually the amount of pain was a good indicator of how bad the cold would get. Dib was in for a rough week.

He got dressed, putting on his usual trench coat. Not quite the same one he wore when he was younger, he had grown quite a bit after all, but it looked very similar. He headed downstairs for breakfast.

Gaz had already left and didnt bother to clean up after herself. Nothing unusual. She did that when she was in a rush. Dib cleaned up the mess. He didn't mind if it made her hate him a little less.

There was no bread left on the shelf. Just his luck. He scanned the kitchen. The only thing he could find in the cupboards was some off-brand cereal. It wasn't very appealing to him but he knew he would completely lose his appetite in days to come.

He poured a small bowl and sat down to eat. After one mouthful he knew this wasn't going to work. Swallowing was too painful. He tipped the bowl out and looked at the clock. 8:45

Great. He was already late.

...

He had History class first again with the new boy he decided was Zim. He looked through the glass pane in the door before entering. Class had started but Zim wasn't there. Oh well.

He entered and found he wasn't that late. The teacher had just finished explaining that they need to partner up and write a document on an ancient society of their choice.

Dib groaned.

Everyone in that class had punched or spat on him at some point. He didn't particularly want to work with any of them. He didn't need to worry though. Before he took his seat the new boy walked in.

"Nice of you to join us Mr. Arik. Since neither you or Dib can be on time, you can work together." The boys looked at each other. Dib wasn't sure this would be much better.

"You two may go to the library and research whatever topic you decide on"

Dib muttered an agreement and left with the other boy trailing behind him. They settled down at the computers at the back of the library. Dib knew exactly what he wanted to do. Ancient Egypt (and how aliens shaped their culture!).

He told the other boy he would do the entire project if he could pick the topic. The boy shrugged so Dib got to work. They sat in silence for a long time before Dib finally asked "You are Zim, aren't you?" The other kid sneered.

"What do you think, Dib-beast?"

It was! He knew it!

"Your disguise got better." Dib commented, gesturing towards him.

Zim just shrugged

"I took ideas from a more qualified invader."

A more qualified invader? Was Zim admitting he wasn't the best?

"You mean there's someone better than you?" Zim snarled.

"Human filth like you wouldn't understand."

Dib bit back his retort. No point starting a fight. He didn't want to draw attention to himself from other students. Zim was only being hostile when provoked so Dib thought it best to get back to work.

The sat in silence for the rest of class. When the bell finally rang he stood up a bit too quickly. Big mistake. The cold and the lack of food made him lightheaded. He took a step forward then collapsed, hitting his head on a chair.

He was only out for a few seconds but people were already surrounding him when he opened his eyes. He pulled himself up. People were trying to drag him off to the nurses office. He stated he was fine but was too tired to resist the nagging. He looked back to see Zim watching him as he left.


	4. Chapter 3: A familiar scene

Chapter 3: A familiar scene

Dib opens his eyes to a dim room. How long had he been there? He'd gone straight to sleep when he got home and that was before noon. He tried to get up but a his hands were drawn to a splitting pain in his head. Yep. There was a lump from where he hit the chair.

Why had he been allowed to sleep? If he had a concussion he might not have woken up.

He called out for Gaz. He heard heavy steps leading up to his room before the door slammed open. "What the fuck do you want?" She was angry, not that that was anything new.

"Can you get me a glass of water ?"

Gaz snapped. "Dad had to leave work to pick you up today. Because of that he has to stay longer than usual so don't you fucking _dare _ask me for anything." With that she slammed the door and left.

Dib sighed. Oh right. His family didn't care for him. They wouldn't even notice if he had have slipped into a coma. Gaz was hard enough to talk to on a good day. Any conversation mentioning their father was painful. Dib figured he'd try and get more rest. A coma would be welcome at this point.

He had only been laying down for a few minutes when there was a knock at the window. He peeked out the blinds and saw Zim standing on a hovering GIR. Of course, like Zim would ever use the front door like a normal person. Dib considers faking sleep and ignoring him. Knowing Zim, if he tried that he'd just get a hole blasted in the wall. Annoyed, he stood to open the window. Zim jumped in without invitation.

"GIR, wait outside so you don't break anything."

With an overly enthusiastic "okay!" the flying dog shot off.

Dib smiled, about to comment when Zim glared at him.

"Zim had to knock on several windows before finding you! One person dumped smelly earth water on me. What do you have to say about this?!" Zim was obviously trying to put the blame on him.

"Well it's your fault for not using the door and forgetting where I live. Why did you assume I even lived here still?"

"Silence Dib-filth, dont question the mighty Zim" Dib half smiles, Zim was as obnoxious as ever.

The alien took the change in his expression as a guilty conscience. It was good enough for him.

"We had a deal in case your puny mind has forgotten" Zim said coldly.

"What?"

"The project foolish earthling!"

Shit. He'd forgotten about that. Mainly because he'd been unconscious most of the day.

"Oh..I'll get it done but in case you haven't noticed, I'm not well"

Why did Zim come all the way here for this?

"Excuses and lies! This is your revenge! Choosing a stupid topic then leaving me to deal with the mess" Overreacting. What else was new. Though Dib was secretly glad to have a bit of old Zim back. The new subdued Zim was less of a headache but it just didn't feel right.

"It isn't due until next week. I'll do it. Just leave Zim.. " he stopped.

"Wait. revenge for trying to destroy the world? I don't think making you do a little skool project would be satisfying enough" Dib almost laughed at the absurdity of it but the look Zim gave him kept him sober.

"ENOUGH? So you admit there is more revenge coming?!" Zim laughed hysterically.

"Now I know your plan! You won't trick me again stupid human. I'll be ready for you."

Dib was about to interrupt his delusional rant when Zim called out for GIR. The little dog suited robot appeared at the window. Zim jumped onto his back and sped away yelling about victory. Zim might have grown but he hadn't matured much.


	5. Chapter 4: A bit of backstory

A/N: Someone asked me why I like ZaDR when Zim has never shown to care about Dib in the show. While that's true, the unfinished episode 'Mopiness of Doom' proves they really care about each other. The show being cancelled doesn't mean that the unfinished episodes aren't canon ;)

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Chapter 4: A bit of backstory

Zim sped past civilians on the way back to his base riding his SIR unit. To them, he just looked like a normal kid on a motorbike. He had perfected the hologram technology to completely change not only his appearance but things around him too.

He no longer needed to hide his ship in the roof of his house (though even if he was seen flying in and out the roof, people were too stupid to question it) Now he just parked it on the front lawn an disguised it as just another gnome. Although his base still had the same men's room door the inside was a lot more normal.

He had fixed the mistakes from when he first came to earth and modeled this house after a luxury apartment. No more toilet elevator in the kitchen. Now he had a fridge elevator. A step in the right direction, at least.

Zim paced the kitchen. Dibs behavior towards him wasn't what he expected. He expected Dib to ecstatic about his return. After all, wasn't he Dib's chance at proving he was right? That the paranormal was real?

Zim had chosen to return to earth because he really was lost. He had no other home.

A part of him wanted to give himself up to Dib. That way his life would have some impact on the world. Dib recognized him from the moment he walked into class, he knew it. So why didn't he react? Zim expected him to jump on the table and scream about how aliens are invading. Instead he seemed indifferent.

He had ignored Zim the entire day. He didn't know what to think when Dib approached him after skool. Instead of babbling on about how Zim will never take earth he gave him an umbrella. Zim was confused and that confusion made him angry.

How dare dib be friendly after everything they've been through. His friendliness must be a trap. Zim came to back to earth half hoping to be exposed. Now he didn't know what to do. Dib is the only one smart enough to see him for what he is. If Dib wasn't interested anymore, what could he do?

Zim PAK buzzed from processing so many emotions at once. It had been damaged in a fight with the Armada. Zim had left to question the tallest in person as they had blocked his calls from the base. At the time he believed it was a mistake. No doubt.

He left earth immediately. He had left GIR on earth in stasis as he needed time to think and didn't want his sir unit to embarrass him in front of his leaders.

Before reaching the Tallest's ship, he was intercepted by none other than Tak. Now that Zim was officially exiled she was free to kill him for entering irken space. It was good enough revenge for her. Explaining Zim wasn't welcome was pointless of course, she had told him before. Even after all that happened he still couldn't believe that.

Zim tried to get past her so the Tallest could explain there obvious mistake.

Tak was joined by a number of other irken ships. In desperation Zim called the Tallest from his voot cruiser, hoping they hadn't blocked that channel.

They hadn't.

The Tallest were less than pleased to see Zim in irken space. They had given the order to destroy the defective and dangerous irken.

Zim was too shocked to respond. Tak took full advantage of his hesitation and fired. It was the damage to Zim and the cruiser snapped him out of his dismay. He set course to earth once again. The Armada didn't pursue him, the Tallest had already said they didn't care what happens to him after all, as long as he is bothering someone else.

It took time to comprehend everything that happened. He was alone. He had always been alone and he couldn't handle it.

The shot had damaged the ships engine. He was only going at half speed. Great. Now he'd have even more time alone. For once he wished he brought GIR.

The solitude was painful. So painful he attempted to delete any memory of the irken empire from his PAK. Life had other plans though. The force of the blow had damaged him too.

"Access denied."

He couldn't even self destruct if he wanted to.

Nor could he delete his survival code so intentionally crashing his ship was out of the question. Dib-human was the only other living being he had made a connection to, as negative as that connection was. Earth was his home now.


	6. Chapter 5: A small meeting

A/N: I feel this is the best chapter to put this:

Zim suffix chart  
~ Hate tier ~  
Dib-shit  
Dib-filth  
~ Dislike tier ~  
Dib-stink  
Dib-beast  
Dib-worm  
~ Neutral tier~  
Dib-human  
~ Friend tier ~  
Dib-friend  
Dib-thing  
~ Love tier~  
Dib-pet  
Dib-love  
Diblet  
Dibling

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Chapter 5: A small meeting

Although Dib hadn't quite recovered from his cold, the bruise on his head from the chair was gone. The project was due in three days and he had yet to do it. He had enough trouble getting out of bed to take a piss, skool was the last thing he wanted to think about.

In the end, the thought of dealing with Zim was even more painful. At least the project was a topic he was well educated on. He sighed and got his ancient alien books.

...

It was the day before the project was due. Dib knew there was no way he'd be going tomorrow if this headache didnt ease up so he had to do the one thing he dreaded. Go to Zim's base.

The walk over felt like a dream. Dib barely remembered how he got there. He wasn't sure of the protocol of going to an ex-enemy alien base. Should he knock or just break in? He didn't need to worry though because the high pitch screeching coming from down the road told him GIR was on his way.

GIR casually walked past Dib and in the door, closing it behind him. Dib was about to knock when GIR opened it again.

"Can I help youuuuu?" The blue eyed robot asked with an upward inflection. He had some how removed his disguise in the few seconds he was behind doors.

"Errr...where is Zim?"

"Inside!" Gir ran inside screaming about waffles for dinner.

Dib wasn't sure if that was an invitation in but since the door was open it was as close as he'd get from the insane robot.

He walked in and gasped. It was nothing like he remembered. This house looked like something only rich couples could afford. Not to mention it was bigger on the inside. The small exterior really was deceiving.

White walls, black leather couches, huge tv built into the wall, even a spa at the back! Dib walked into the eating space and examined the sink. Real water.

Why Zim would build all this into his base, he didn't know. Zim couldn't use the sink.

"Ahem. "

Dib jumped.

"Zim! Sorry I just... Why is it so different?" Dib was perplexed.

"I blend in better" Zim leaned against the wall.

"No offense Zim, but this makes you stand out more. This kind of place doesn't fit in with this neighbor hood."

"Isn't this what humans like in a house?" Zim retorted, crossing his arms.

"Well, yes, but that's not the point." How could he not see what was wrong here?

"Would you not be happy living here?"

"Yes but still not the point Zim!" He thought about the question.

"Wait .._here_ here?" Dib was baffled. What was the alien up to?

Zim contemplated that before shaking his head.

"Why are you here, Dib-stink."

"I brought over the project since I won't be at school tomorrow."

Zim snatched the document out of Dibs hands and skimmed over it.

"This is unacceptable. Aliens didn't interfere with your stupid planet history"

"Maybe not your race." muttered Dib.

"_No_ race would interact with your primitive species aside from taking test subjects."

Dib was about to counter that but thought better of it. The years of torment had made him more passive about arguing his beliefs. Zim noticed this. Obviously expecting an argument he pushed further

"Of course with your superior knowledge of aliens you should have known that. Unless, of course, everything you know is wrong and you're no smarter than the rest of your worthless race."

Dib stayed silent. Zim was just echoing everything he had thought about himself in the past few years.

"Dib-human?" Zim pressed.

"I should go. Make sure you hand in the project."

He started walking towards the door.

"Wait."

Dib stopped but didn't turn around.

"I'm sorry Dib-thing. You aren't that bad. For a human"

Dib was confused. His headache was slowing his thought process. Didn't Zim hate him? That was logical. He had stopped Zims evil plans and ruined the possibility of him being a real invader. Dib was about to voice his thoughts when Zim hugged him. Actually hugged him! Do irkens hug? Surely not.

"W-what are you doing?" Dib stuttered.

"I will see you at skool."

Zim turned and stepped into the fridge.


	7. Chapter 6: Skool drama

Chapter 6: Skool drama

It was Friday. It had been a few days since Dib had been to the base. Zim sat alone in math class. He had been hoping Dib would turn up and sit next to him. He really could use the company. He assumed with the table he chose Dib would have to sit with him was only one other empty table and no one would sit on the tables with the two losers.

When Dib finally turned up he went straight over to the empty table on the far side of the room. He hadn't even noticed Zim was in this class.

Great.

As other students came in they whispered to each other and chose to all crowd around the other tables than sit with either of them. Zim didn't mind. He was lonely but there was only so much stupidity he could take. Rejection of Zim was natural after all. The humans instinctively knew to avoid him even if they weren't smart enough to work out _why_ they avoided him. Dib on the other hand was clearly effected by this rejection. The week of sickness and confusion had left him emotional. He looked on the verge of tears.

Thankfully, the teacher interrupted before the other students noticed.

"Will you all spread out. There are plenty of seats."

Everyone groaned.

"But we don't want to sit with the freaks." Someone whined.

The teacher scowled. "I said spread out!"

A voice from the back called out "Try and make us!"

The teacher slammed his fist on the desk.

"I don't get paid enough for this shit."

He muttered curses under his breath.

"Everyone move now or you will get detention for a month"

No one moved. Even Zim was a little offended that these earth children rathered detention than sitting within a meter of him.

The teacher looked like he was about to explode. Zim swallowed and got up. He moved across the room and sat next to Dib-human.

The teacher huffed, still pissed at the questioning of his authority "Well we've contained the problem over there so will you take your seats and get to work."

Zim turned to Dib while the other kids shuffled around.

"Are you okay Dib-thing?"

"I suppose. It's been like this since my first day here you'd think I'd get used to it" Dib still didn't look up.

"Well you really weren't any more popular at skool either."

Dib sniffed. Damn it.

"Sorry"

A few minutes past and Zim was still thinking of ways to pick up the conversation. Socializing wasn't his strong point.

"Hey Zim?" Dib broke the silence

"What?"

"Why did you leave?"

Dib finally turned to face him.

"The see my-" The irken stuttered ''_the _Tallest"

"Why?"

Zim narrowed his eyes. "You know why." He muttered accusingly.

"I know why but how could you have possibly thought it was a good idea?"

Zim growled and Dib flinched. He lightened when he saw the scythe haired boys expression. Dib looked like he was expecting Zim to bite.

"It wasnt a good idea but I _needed_ to go. I'd never have accepted it otherwise."

He paused.

"Now I have a question for you.. Why haven't you tried to strap me to an autopsy table yet?"

Dib chuckled. This was the first time Zim had heard him laugh in many years.

"Well if your not going to destroy earth I have no reason to. Wait, you aren't going to destroy earth right?"

"No. It would be wasted effort. But even so, don't you still want to prove the existence of aliens?"

Dib hesitated.

"Yes and no. It won't change anything. It will only induce fear. You were right Zim. People are too stupid to see what's in front of them. They don't want the truth." Dib slouched in his chair. Had he given up?

"Well, I guess that's something our races have in common."

Dib was about to ask what he means when the bell rang. Zim left without another word.

* * *

A/N: The whole table drama is actually a true story. My friend and I were deemed as the losers in high school so when we stopped talking and sat on opposite ends of the room, everyone would crowd around the other tables. Needless to say, the teachers were never pleased.


	8. Chapter 7: Lunch, part 1

Chapter 7: Lunch, part 1

Dib didn't see Zim again that day. Mostly due to the fact they didn't have any other classes together on Fridays.

He had been in a better mood since math class. On top of having human contact (well alien contact) there had been no jibes from other kids or things thrown at him that day.

Dib splayed out on his bed. Could he really become friends with zim? Years ago he wouldn't have thought it possible for a number of reasons. Aside from the obvious world domination thing, dib had found zims ego infuriating and zim had proved he had no understanding or need for friends.

That last part made sense. You don't befriend the race you plan on eradicating. But then again, Zim never even had his own race for support.

Dib wondered what it must be like to be betrayed by your own species. Well, he didn't really need to wonder, he knew exactly how that felt. They just couldn't dump him on another planet. No doubt they would if they had the technology.

This was a painful thought but it gave him hope for the future. They were both lonely, outcasts amongst their own species. They needed each other. He hoped zim had realised that too.

Dib considered going to Zims base and asking him to come out for lunch on the weekend. Social interaction wasn't something either of them had experience in though.

Dib knew it was going to be awkward no matter who initiated it. He sighed. Alright, tomorrow at noon.

...

This time Dib didn't hesitate to knock. They were past the enemy stage so he assumed basic curtesy applied. Zim answered.

"Oh it's you. GIR is expecting pizza" pizza? Damn. There go his plans of of asking Zim to Bloaty's Pizza for lunch.

"What do you want?"

Dib couldn't think of any way out so he went with the truth.

"I was going to ask if you wanted to go get pizza for lunch but looks like GIR had the same idea"

Zim tilted his head.

"You wanted to go out to lunch with me?"

"Yeah, I guess."

"Well you might as well come in. GIR ordered a lot and I can't eat the filth. No difference from watching you eat here or there."

He had a point. Why he thought pizza was a good idea was beyond him. He was glad that Zim implied he was willing to go anyway. Dib followed him in. A dog suited GIR ran up and hugged his leg. It just occurred to Dib that he hadn't seen Zim without his disguise yet.

"Zim, do you ever take your disguise off?"

"What? Oh. Well technically I'm not wearing one so I don't remember to turn it off."

Dib blinked. Turn it off?

"It's a hologram, stupid worm-beast."

"Like Tak's?"

"A little more advanced but yes. With no wig or itchy contacts to remind me, I don't even realise it's on."

"Isn't that risky? What if you forgot to turn it on before going out?"

"Well I never turn it off so I don't have to worry about that."

"Oh, right."

Silence.

Dib couldn't ask to see him now so he shrugged and sat down.

"I love you" said GIR breaking the silence, still clinging to Dib.

Zim watched them. He could tell what Dib was thinking as easily as if he said it aloud. He reached down and twisted the watch on his wrist. Dib looked up and gasped.

It had been so long since he had seen the true Zim, it was a shock. If zim was offended, he didn't show it.

Dib was speechless. Zim had changed a bit. He had a scar that ran from his cheek to his shoulder. His eyes were brighter red and more cat like. The antennae on his head were a little longer.

Zim suddenly felt self conscious. He hadn't really been aware Dib wasnt seeing him as he really was.

The fact he had changed so much never even occurred to him until he saw the look dib was giving him. What that look was he wasn't sure. Pity? Wonder? Disgust? Whatever it was, it made him uncomfortable.

He went to sit down next to him as naturally as he could. Since Dib didn't flinch away he could rule out disgust.

"Stop staring, Dib-beast."

Dib blinked. Opps. He looked away. He just wasn't expecting this.

"Sorry, I just.. Well, you look so different. How did this happen?"

Dib ran a finger along Zim's scar and stopped at zims neck. The alien purred at the contact. Dib blushed and pulled his hand back. What was he doing?

"The Armada shot down my voot cruiser. I guess I got damaged in the impact." He replied nonchalantly. Honestly, he hadn't even felt the pain from the impact until days later.

Guilt instantly hit Dib.

"Sorry"

"What are you apologizing for, Dib-friend."

Friend? That was new. Even though making friends was the whole reason he was there it still sounded weird to him. Did this mean Zim had the same intentions?

"Oh, I dunno. Just maybe if I hadn't of stopped you taking over earth it might have been different."

Zim frowned making Dib feel even worse.

"You think you are what protected earth?" Zim hissed. He wasn't angry at the human, just his incompetence. Dib was unsure of what to say so he opted for silence.

"No, it wouldn't have changed anything." Zim continued.

"Not like I could have possibly succeeded anyway. Maybe the Tallest were right to get rid of me."

Dib still wasn't sure what to say that would lighten the mood. Thankfully Zim changed the subject.

"You have your own scars."

He said, pointing to an old gash on Dibs forehead.

"Yeah, the kids at school don't always avoid me. That one was from a chair being thrown at me." Cringing at the memory.

"Why would they throw a chair at you?" Zim was bemused. Years ago he would have laughed. Now it pissed him off.

"They thought it would be funny, I guess. They laughed as I got stitches in the nurses office."

Zim growled.

"These are the same people you want to protect?"

Dib studied the floor. A lot had changed since he was 11.

"Not anymore. I wouldn't mind seeing them enslaved."

Zim frowned again. He had come to earth secretly wanting to be captured by Dib. Now it seems like Dib secretly wanted Zim to invade earth. How ironic he thought.

"You don't want to be here" It was more of a statement than a question. "And I _have _to be here." They both thought about this.

"Do you think we were always meant to be friends?"

Dib considered that. He couldn't see anyway for them to have got along back then but with everything they have both gone through, it seemed inevitable now.

"I'd like to think so." Dib said, offering Zim a small smile. "Also looks like pizza is finally here." With that, there was a knock at the door.


	9. Chapter 8: Lunch, part 2

Chapter 8: Lunch, part 2

They had eaten lunch in comfortable silence as GIR had turned on the tv. Zim had retrieved some sugary snack from his kitchen as Dib and GIR settled down on the floor. Once the pizza was finished off, Dib thought it safe to start a new conversation.

"Hey Zim, what do you do every day if your not planning world domination?"

Zim motioned to his elevator fridge.

"I've been redesigning irken technology in my lab. The hologram watch is a good example" he took the watch off and held it out. It took Dib a moment to realise he was being allowed to inspect it.

"How does it work?"

"Twist the top and have a clear idea of what you want to look like."

Dib had actually meant how can a _watch_ project the hologram but he didn't correct him. He looked at zim as he twisted the watch.

Zim couldn't help it. He laughed like a maniac. Much like when they were younger and zim was planning something evil. Dib looked like a copy of the irken in front of him.

"Of everybody you could have chosen, you wanted me. I'm flattered."

Dib blushed at the unintentional double meaning behind Zim's words, not that it was noticeable beneath the irken disguise.

"I was looking at you when I turned it! That's all." He hurriedly took the watch off and tossed it back to Zim who continued to smirk.

Dib changed the subject.

"So, Arik, huh?"

Zims antennae twitched and he showed his sharp teeth.

"I was wondering when you'd comment on that. I looked into foreign names and chose the first one I found."

"Huh, less interesting than I thought."

Dib shrugged "I thought you might have based the name and hologram on someone."

Zim's hologram was based on someone. Dib actually.

The hair was much like Zim's old wig but the clothing was like a parody of Dib. Long dark red coat, a gray shirt with an angry face and black jeans.

It wasn't intentional at first. It was just that Dibs attire was the only clothing he really took notice of. He didn't even remember the faces of the other kids let alone their clothes.

Zim nearly laughed. He subconsciously wanted to be like Dib even before he knew it himself.

Dib curled up on the couch next to him and yawned.

"Dib-thing, why did you want me to go to lunch with you?"

Dib looked awkward again. "Oh, I dunno. That's what friends do."

He shrugged it off and closed his eyes.

Zim sat back and thought for a few minutes. It wasn't long before the heavy breathing told him Dib was asleep.

...

Dib awoke to see blue glowing eyes right in front of his face . He nearly yelled but then realised he was still in Zims base. The irken was nowhere to be seen though.

"GIR? How long have I been here? Where is Zim?"

The insane robot held his hand to his face.

"Master yelled at me and went to his lab. He told me to watch you."

Dib shook his head.

"I made biscuits!" with that, the little robot sped off. He wasn't sure if he should leave or wait for Zim to return.

In the end decided to just go to Zim and tell him he was leaving.


	10. Chapter 9: Damage

Chapter 9: Damage

Dib stepped out of the elevator fridge. It was a lot more comfortable than its predecessor, that's for sure.

Dib was glad to see that the underground base hadn't changed. It made it easier to find Zim as he had broken in here many times in his childhood. He cautiously wandered through the lower levels since he wasn't sure if Zim would be pleased about his intrusion, even if they were friends now.

There was a glowing light coming from one of the labs. Dib assumed that was were Zim was. He crept into the room.

"Zim?"

No response.

He looked around. There were tools scattered over the benches so Zim must have been working on something recently. He looked around and shuddered, imagining what it would be like if Zim decided to experiment on him. For all he knew that was Zim plan. Lure him down here to capture him then strap him to an autopsy table. It would be a fitting end with all the times he nearly did it to Zim.

He heard a scraping noise and stopped. It was coming from the far bench.

"Zim..?" he called again

Then he saw it. Zim's PAK was on the table. Couldn't Zim only live for a short time without it? So where was he? He remembered the time Zim's PAK had nearly taken over his body and considered running. No, then his friend will definitely die. He'd just have to be cautious.

He looked over the bench. Zim was on the floor. His eyes seemed to follow Dib as he moved around to reach him. That at least told him the alien was alive.

"Zim, why did you take your PAK off?"

The alien mumbled something incoherent. Dib knew he had to reattach it. If Zim couldn't even speak he mustn't have long left. Dib grabbed the PAK, holding it as far away as possible and pushed it into Zim's spine. Thankfully, it worked. Zim was recovering.

"Thank you, Dib-pet." he huffed. Dib didn't bother thinking about Zim's new suffix for him. He was too worried.

"What were you doing exactly?" Zim closed his eyes for a moment as his energy flowed back. He took a deep breath.

"My PAK was damaged when my ship was hit. "

It took a moment for Dib to realise what he was referring to.

"Damaged how? You seem fine to me."

"The personality core and emotion center are malfunctioning. You haven't noticed I've changed?" Zim looked at him with mock-hurt.

"I noticed you were less of a headache. I assumed you'd just grown up."

"Zim is far older than you, earthling. I can't just 'grow up'"

Older? How much older? He had never thought about irken lifespans before. He assumed Zim was his age because of his height. He was still much shorter than Dib but he had grown since his first day on earth. He knew irkens could get much taller. Maybe irken height wasn't based on age.

"How old are you?" Dib wasn't sure he wanted to know. He didn't need to be reminded of his own mortality.

"Around 160 of your earth years. Nearly an adult."

160? No way. He suddenly felt bad for Zim. Even if they were to remain friends, Dib would still die much, much sooner. Zim continued.

"I had removed it trying to see if I could create a duplicate PAK if this one fails completely. I think it's possible to transfer my memories and personality but the damage is preventing me from accessing the files."

"Why didn't you put it back on when you started losing focus?"

Zim scoffed.

"I tried but I was too uncoordinated."

Dib tried not to let his concern show.

"Will you be okay?" Zim regarded him for a minute.

"Yes, Dib-friend. You should leave."

Dib helped him to his feet.

"Alright, I'll see you at skool."

He was a little awkward. Dib wasn't sure if it was acceptable to hug him. Last time Zim had said that line and hugged him. Should he do the same?

Zim noticed Dibs internal struggle and took the initiative, stepping forward and wrapping his arms around the human.

Was Zim..purring? He had heard Zim purr before but never so contentedly. He thought it best not to read to much into it and pulled away.

He smiled

"Bye, zim."


	11. Chapter 10: Realization

Chapter 10: Realization

Zim walked slowly on the way to skool. He didn't need to worry about being late or failing. It wasn't like he even needed to go. He first went to skool to study humans and find their weakness. That was all pointless now. He only chose to go to hi-skool to help pass the days. Not to mention getting closer to the Dib-human.

He wondered what he would do in several years. The worm-beasts in this town were stupid but even they'd notice that he hadn't aged with them. He dreaded the thought of having to relocate every few years. Why did their species have to be so different?

It was Monday so he had history class first with Dib. Their desks were predetermined so they couldn't sit together. Not that he minded too much. He was used to sitting alone after all. The teacher also seemed to like him more after the project they had done together (well, the one he had put his name on). It seemed the teacher liked the idea of aliens shaping human evolution.

When Zim finally entered class and took his seat, he noticed half the class was missing, including Dib. The teacher was already there and didn't bother to wait for anyone else. He instantly ordered everyone to copy notes from the board. Zim was beginning to wish he had have skipped class. It wasn't like he was missing much and anything important would have to be gone over again next class with so many students missing.

Around 20 minutes into class, a group of students entered the room. Zim wasn't surprised to see that Dib wasn't among them. He wasn't exactly popular.

The students sat down around him and started talking amongst themselves.

"Where do you think he ran off to?"

Someone laughed

"He was heading towards the toilets last I saw him."

"Hopefully he is still there at lunch."

Zim didn't care much for the mindless dribble of these worm babies so he did his best to block it out.

"Did you get his diary?"

"Yeah but there nothing in it but a bunch of nonsense about ghosts and aliens."

Aliens? They couldn't be talking about Dib could they? Even if they weren't, the thought made Zim's blood ran cold

"Not surprising. He is a freak after all."

Zim growled loud enough for all eyes to turn on him. Without bothering to get a hall pass, he stormed out. So much for not drawing attention to himself.

He stalked through the corridor and pushed open the door to the boys bathroom.

"Dib...?"

Nothing. No one was there. Zim sighed. He was getting work up over nothing.

He turned around and jumped.

Dib was standing behind him, head down with a blood nose.

"Dib-thing, what happened to you?"

Dib smiled, though it didn't quite reach his eyes.

"Bad run in with some people. Nothing unusual."

Dib shrugged as Zim approached him. He was furious.

Zim wiped the blood from the humans face only to jump back when it burned him, hissing softly.

"How did this happen?" he growled with narrow eyes.

"I called them out for teasing some first year. They didn't take kindly too it. Nothing too bad. They did steal my books though." Dib shrugged again. He knew what he was in for when he interfered. Zim would have laughed if he couldn't sense the pain Dib was in. It was just like him too be more worried about his research than his injuries.

"I heard the worm-babies say they will look for you at lunch."

"They won't find me. Ive got experience in hiding." He smirked remembering all the times he broke into the base and never got discovered. Zim of course always knew he was there, he was just careful never to reveal information when he sensed he was being watched.

Zim stepped back.

"They will pay for damaging irken property." Zim murmured, mostly to himself.

Dib tilted his head. IRKEN property?

"What do you mean 'Irken property"?" He said with an edge to his voice.

"We are friends now Diblet. You are mine."

"I don't think you understand the meaning of 'friend', Zim."

Zim had no idea what the other boy was trying to say. They had established before they were friends so what was the issue now?

"Are you saying you do not care for the mighty ZIM?!"

"What? No!"

"No? NO? You dare reject ZIM?"

Dib nearly face palmed. He forgot how hard it was to talk to the alien when he was like this. Zim on the other hand was furious.

"So this is your revenge! Make Zim care for you then leave him. Foolish stink-beast! Zim needs nobody!" How could he have trusted someone of such a primitive species.

Dib rolled his eyes and stepped towards the bipolar alien. Zim pushed him with enough force to knock him over.

"Stay away from me, Dib-filth."

Dib was surprised by that. Zim was always prone to over reactions but he assumed they were past this.

"Zim, listen! We are FRIENDS. Being friends doesn't make you someones property."

"But you ARE my property. If friend isn't the word than what is?"

Dib sighed. Where was this conversation going?

"I don't know, Zim."

This was all too much for the alien in his current state of mind.

"Zim needs time to think."

With his head down he wandered off down the corridor and sat down. If what he felt for the human wasn't friendship, what was it?


	12. Chapter 11: Confrontation

Chapter 11: Confrontation

Dib sat around for a while but in the end, didn't feel like going to any of his classes. The argument with Zim had left him confused. He decided to use the blood nose he had obtained to his advantage. He went to the front office and asked to be sent home. The woman at the desk didn't look up, she simply dismissed him. If getting out of skool was that easy he was surprised more kids didn't try it.

Dib headed straight home. He couldn't stop thinking about the alien.

He had known from the day he returned to earth that the exile had effected Zim badly. That was probably what fueled the aliens inferiority complex. Honestly, he'd rather the superiority complex that Zim usually had. As infuriating as that was, Dib understood it was only a mask.

He was greeted with a loud crash as he walked in the front door.

"Weeeeeeeehoooooo."

The little robot had tipped over a bookshelf.

"GIR, get back up here!"

Zim was in his room? Uh oh.

Dib ignored the mess and headed upstairs. He got up to the second last step before Zim blocked his path. He wasn't in his disguise so even though Zim was two steps above him, he wasn't much taller.

"Dib-human!? You're home early."

He commented.

"Why are you in my house?"

He wasn't mad, just suspicious. After this morning he would be surprised if the alien started planning revenge for the misunderstanding.

Zim watched him for a moment.

"I'm sorry."

Dib smiled. He knew that Zim's ego prevented an explanation. Not that he didn't already know the answer.

They studied each other for a moment before Zim leaned down to him. Dib blinked.

Zim was..kissing him?

Before Dib had a chance to work out what was going on, Zim pulled away.

_Crash_

"GIR! What are you doing!?" Zim pushed past him. After a minute Dib went after him.

One problem at a time. If Dib didn't clean up the house before Gaz got home, he probably wouldn't get a chance to figure things out.

Zim ordered GIR back to the base while Dib restocked the shelves. He was nearly done when Zim returned.

"Dib..." Zim was very close. He had Dib pressed up against the bookshelf.

"Zim, what is going on?" He was choosing his words carefully as not to antagonize him.

"You are mine, Dib-pet. Not irken property but mine."

Dib felt his face heat up. Is this the aliens version of a confession? He slipped away from the bookshelf and put some space between them.

"I'm still not sure what you mean, Zim"

Zim hissed. Opps. Wrong thing to say.

"I am defective. I was defective long before the damage to my PAK. Irkens do not form attachments. They do not feel love."

The relationship they had up until now had been platonic. Dib assumed that a race of invaders didn't have emotions other than anger so he never considered the possibility there might be more to his ex-enemy.

"Are you saying you love me?"

"Noooo, how did you get that, Dib-worm" Zim replied, sarcastically.

Dib didn't know what to do. He had thought about how an alien-human relationship would work when he was younger, even before Zim came to earth. Even so, how could this possibly work?

Zim started towards him. Dib found himself instinctively backing up, Zim's possessive side was intimidating. He had never thought he would be the object of Zims obsession.

"How much do you know about human relationships?"

Zim paused.

"I know little of your earth mating rituals. Tell me, Dib, how should I proceed?"

"Do research, I suppose. I'm not comfortable explaining all the details."

Zim's eyes narrowed.

"Why? What are you hiding?"

Of course Zim would misunderstand.

"Please, Zim, just... research."

Dib wasn't sure he could answer anyway. He didn't have any experience in relationships. Emotional or otherwise.

"Very well. I shall return"

With that, he turned the hologram watch and marched out the door.

...

Dib waited for Gaz to get home. They didn't talk much and when they did, it was never pleasant. With his dad never around, he had no one else to turn to.

Gaz walked in the door around tea time. Dib had been thinking of ways to start the conversation he wanted to have but in the end couldn't think of anything. He decided it was best to improvise.

"Hey, Gaz, what do you think of Zim?"

Gaz tensed up.

"Why are you asking me, exactly?"

Dib was about to say 'because dad isn't here.' but immediately saw how that could backfire.

"I need your advice."

"If this is about the freaky relationship you two have, I'm not interested." she said as she pulled some left over pizza out of the fridge. "But you've been less mopey since he came back so do whatever you want."

"Wait, how do you even know Zim is back?"

Dib didn't think he had spoken of Zim to her in years.

"You talk to yourself. A lot." Oh right. That was one thing that had never changed.

"So it's not weird?"

"Your creepy alien fetish? Yeah, it's weird. Just don't bother me with it and there's no problem."

Dib smiled.

"Thanks, Gaz"


	13. Chapter 12: First night

Chapter 12: First night

Zim had left Dibs house and headed to the park.

Everything he knew about humans, he had learned from the TV programs GIR watched. No wonder he didn't know how to proceed.

There were several couples in the park. All of them were either holding hands or making out. Zim had already noted these things. Dib had rejected his attempts of 'making out'. Maybe that meant Dib was a defective human.

Zim approached two girls gossiping on a bench.

"Greetings, earth worm-babies. Tell me, how should one prepare themselves for earthling mating rituals?"

The two girls shared a look and giggled, misinterpreting Zim's approach.

"You mean like a date?"

One girl asked.

"A date? What is this date you speak of?"

The girls looked at each other again.

"You make plans and go out together. Duh."

He and Dib already did that though. Or at least, Dib had tried too. Did that mean Dib had tried to mate with him?

"Where can I learn more about this 'date'?"

More giggling followed.

"Try watching some romance movies."

"Intriguing. Very well. GIR!"

The little robot dog came running.

"I was feeding the water chickens. They like me."

"GIR, we are going to rent some movies."

The robots eyes lit up beneath the suit.

"Yaaaaay!"

"_Not _Intestines of War"

GIR stopped, tearing up.

To avoid a tantrum Zim changed the subject.

"Let's get tacos on the way home."

...

Zim knocked on Dibs window. It was shortly after midnight and Zim had questions about all he'd learned in the last few hours. A very sleepy, shirtless Dib answered.

"Zim, what are you doing?"

"May I come in?"

"Sure, whatever." Dib was too tired to argue. He went to lie down again. Much to his surprise, Zim climbed in with him.

"Zim, what _are_ you doing?" he asked again with more force.

"Utilizing my new found knowledge."

_What _knowledge? Dib wasn't sure he wanted to know.

Dib would have pushed him out but he was far too exhausted. He tried to ignore him but he had never shared a bed with anybody. There was no way he'd sleep now. Surely Zim wouldn't try anything though.

Zim lay beside him, softly purring to himself. What could he possibly be thinking?

"Dib...?"

Dib ignored him. Any conversation could wait until morning.

Zim tentatively wrapped his arms around the humans waist and pulled in close. Dib was glad it was so dark. He rolled into his back.

Zim was silent for a moment before reaching out and kissing Dibs neck. Dib wouldn't have complained but he was afraid of how badly things could go with Zim's 'new found knowledge'.

"What are you playing at?"

"This is how humans show affection, is it not?"

Dib rolled his eyes.

"It's how COUPLES show affection."

"You should feel honored that the mighty Zim shows you this affection."

Dib smiled at that. He guess it wasn't THAT bad. His curiosity got the better of him.

"I'm not complaining." he said after a moment.

Dib rolled to face the alien then pushed him onto his back. They had effectively switched positions so now Dib had his arm around the irken.

He really was like a cat sometimes. Curious, Dib reached up to pet his antennae. Zim tensed at first contact before letting himself relax. His purring increased in volume.

"What are these for exactly?"

Zim let out a soft 'hmmm' before answering.

"Not much. They can pick up vibrations but they are mostly for communication. Much like your human eyebrows." Dib grinned.

"A lot more sensitive by the looks of it" The irken looked so defenseless. The way his antennae twitched reminded him of a dog's ears.

He ran his fingers along the stalk.

"Don't stop..." Zim breathed.

Dib began to get uncomfortable when Zim moaned. He was enjoying it a little too much.

He pulled away when the alien began clawing at the blankets. Zim instantly regained himself when the pressure disappeared. Rather than being embarrassed by his momentary loss of control, he became defensive.

"What did you do to ZIM?!"

He yelled, with a fierce glare.

Any other time, Dib would have teased him over his reaction. Since Gaz was only down the hall he decided it was best to calm him before she murdered them both.

"I'm sorry, Zim. I didn't know."

Zim just glared at him. Dib had questions of his own.

"Zim, why is it such a big deal?"

The alien paused, thinking about his response. Dib was grateful when he didn't yell again.

"Zim does not like being weak."

"You aren't weak..." Dib looked at him intently "You said I am yours. Letting your guard down comes with the territory"

"That is part of these 'relationships'?"

"Well, yes. Relationships usually involve two people being completely open with each other."

The irken contemplated this then melted against him.

"Thank you, Dib-pet. It was ..nice."

Dib ran his fingers along where the aliens collar bone should be.

"Don't worry. You were pretty cute."

"Zim is not cute." Thankfully, there was no anger in his voice. Dib smiled.

"I think you are. The mighty cute alien invader."

Geez, that's something he'd never thought he'd say. It was a little too corny for his taste but surprisingly, the alien took it well. He must have taken the 'completely open' conversation very seriously.

"Cute is a great compliment for humans, is it not?"

"Yeah, it is."

Zim smiled.

"Dib-human is cute, too."

Dib blushed. The alien was being nicer than usual. He never imagined being complimented so sincerely by Zim. It was different.

Dib pulled in closer. He had grown comfortable about the situation and was unable to hold back sleep any longer.


	14. Chapter 13: Problem

Chapter 13: Problem

Zim had gone by the time Dib woke up. He wasn't too surprised since he wasn't even sure aliens needed to sleep. Dib wasn't quite sure if he was up for school after what happened yesterday. There would be repercussions for getting in the 'cool kids' way.

A rumbling stomach reminded him that he hadn't eaten last night. Climbing out of bed he grabbed a brush to straighten out his hair scythe. He honestly didn't know why he kept his hair like that. It seemed to fall that way naturally and was easy to maintain. Plus it made him stand out, though he wasn't sure that was a good thing these days. One of these days he promised he'd style it differently. He headed downstairs to find Gaz sitting at the table.

"Morning!" Dib chirped. He was in a strangely good mood.

"What the hell happened to you? You're acting weird." Gaz sat down her game and gave him her full attention. A rare feat.

"What do you mean, 'weird'?"

"Well, not weird. Normal. Which is weird." Dib noticed she had turned her game off. Crap, him being happy couldn't be THAT weird, could it?

"I had a good night sleep."

"Wasn't Zim in your room last night?" Uh oh. Maybe this was her passive aggressive way of telling him to be quiet at night or else...or maybe she was getting at something else. No, no way. Dib didn't want to know what she was thinking.

"Er, yeah. He came over to talk about some stuff. He didn't yell did he?" He didn't remember being yelled at but he had other things on his mind.

"No, which is what concerns me. What were you doing to keep him quiet?" Gaz tilted her head, a faint smirk on her face. She was teasing him.

"Nothing! I don't know what your thinking but it's not that!"

"Of course..." with that she picked up her game again, satisfied with the short conversation.

Dib shrugged and smiled again. Gaz rarely spoke to him without a threat of some kind. Best not push his luck. It was still pretty early. He didn't have class for another hour and a half. Rather than having off brand cereal again, he decided he'd head to Zim's base and see if he wanted to go out for breakfast. Grabbing his wallet and bag he headed for the door, murmuring a quick goodbye to Gaz.

On the walk over, Dib wondered about the previous night. He never imagined Zim climbing in bed with him, as innocent as that action had been. He wasn't really sure where there relationship stood now. It seemed they were dating but neither of them really had really stated it. Dib wasn't going to deny he cared about but Zim but not only was he an alien, he was MALE. While that didn't matter to him much, it certainly wouldn't help his already damaged reputation.

Dib wasn't even sure why he cared about anyones opinion. He certainly never did before. Maybe he should talk to Zim about this and make sure he realised that a relationship would draw a lot of attention, most of it negative. He walked up to the front door. The gnomes watched him but never fired. Dib realised Zim must have programmed them not to sometime after his return. At little warmed by that he knocked.

A few moments past an no answer. He knocked again. There was no way Zim could have left already. He opened the door. He really needed to start locking it, Dib thought. Zim wasn't in any of the living quarters so he must be in the lab. That was strange. If he was under ground the computer should have alerted Zim to his presence. Worried Zim had removed his PAK again he ran to the elevator.

_Please don't be dead._

Dib stepped out into the main control room.

"Zim?"

He could see a figure crouching on the floor in front of him. His PAK was attached so he wasn't in immediate danger.

"Zim! Are you okay? What happened?"

He rushed forward and bend down to him. A sob broke from the figure.

"...Dib...pet.." He murmured between sobs. What could have possibly happened to make him cry? Dib didn't even think he could cry.

He didn't question him just yet though. Zim didn't seem to be in any state to converse. He just pressed against him for comfort. Zim pulled back for a moment. Probably uncomfortable about being seen as weak. Eventually he wrapped his arm around Dib and held him tight.

His sobbing had slowed but he was still shaking a lot. Dib noticed GIR off to the other side of the room playing with mini moose. Completely oblivious to Zim's pain.

"Zim is sorry. I had not expected... this"

"What do you 'this'? What happened."

Zim drew a shaky breath.

"There was a call waiting for Zim when I got home...from the tallest."

What? Dib wasn't exactly sure what had happened while Zim was away but he was certain they had abandoned him. What could they have possibly called for. Zim was quiet for a moment. Dib didn't want to push Zim if he wasn't ready to talk.

"They think... Some snacking planets got blown up and they think I'm behind it."

"How could they possibly think that? Wouldn't they notice if you entered irken space?"

Zim growled softly, digging is gloved claws into Dibs coat.

"They think only Zim could cause so much destruction. They have an order to retrieve me... If I don't go to them, they'll just blow up the planet."

Dib was shocked. Earth was in danger by the irken race once again but this time, Zim was only indirectly involved.

"If you go, what would they do to you? They have ways to prove your innocence right?"

Zim tensed, remembering the last trial. It was another roughly disguised attempt to get rid of him that backfired. How had he been so blind?

"Yes...usually an irkens memories are accessed and displayed publicly. But Zim doubts that will happen again."

"Again?" Dib repeated, trying to keep up.

"Not long after arriving on earth I was called to a trial for past mistakes. They deemed me defective and tried to erase me. The damaged files in my PAK corrupted the control brains and I got away with the title of 'best invader ever'. I believe the tallest won't take that chance again and go for a public execution instead."

Dib was outraged at the unjust of it. He guessed he shouldn't be too surprised. They were a race of conquerors after all. Fairness didn't have much place in irken society.

"How much time do we have before they destroy earth?"

Zim thought for a monent.

"The Massive is a quite a few light years away. Assuming they are already on their way and have no distractions I'd say six months."

Dib sighed and relaxed a little. That gave them a little time to think of something. He hugged Zim again.

"We'll think of something." he promised. Zim didn't respond but buried into Dibs neck. "Dib..why are you here?"

Oh right!

"I came to ask if you wanted to go to breakfast."

Zim have a weak purr.

"That would be great."


	15. Chapter 14: Breakfast date

Chapter 14: Breakfast date

Zim walked beside his human companion rather subdued. He was grateful that Dib was giving him a chance to calm down enough to think of a plan. He didn't see much hope though. When had plans ever worked out? Admittedly, his failures were always for the best. Even if he failed this time, it was probably a good thing. He was defective. He could feel emotional pain and he would outlive the only person who cared for him. Zim wasn't sure if he could cope with that.

Dib noticed the silence. Silent Zim meant nothing good.

"Zim, where do you want to go for breakfast? Have you ever had crepes? Or a bacon and egg sub? We could go to the cafe near the school. It's a little expensive but the food is really good." Dib rambled hoping to distract the alien. Thankfully, it worked.

"I cannot eat your disgusting earth meat."

Zim grimaced. Too many bad memories.

"Have you tried it outside of skool? Even I can't eat skool lunch meat. It's not fit for human consumption let alone alien."

Zim wondered. Outside of skool, he only really ate irken snacks.

"Is this bacon and egg good?"

"It's amazing!"

Zim nodded.

"Very well. I shall trust your judgement." Dib grinned. He was amazed Zim would trust him so easily given their past experience with meat.

They walked into the cafe and sat down.

"So what did you want to try?"

Zim didn't really know what to expect. He'd hardly tried any earth food that wasn't a sugary snack.

"Zim is not sure. You will choose for me, earthling!" he said was a bit of his old personality shining through.

"I would like apple juice for the drink though."

Dib nodded and went up to the counter to place his order. Zim absentmindedly skimmed over the menu. There were no pictures so Zim had no idea what they were. When Dib returned he asked

"What is French toast? How is it different than regular toast? Do they import it or do French people have to cook it?"

Dib chuckled. He was glad something so trivial could distract him from the danger they were in.

"It's bread soaked in milk and egg before being fried. Usually it's covered in sugar too."

Zim wondered how people come up with such recipes. It sounded like something GIR would make out of boredom, maybe a little less soap though.

"I would like to try it... As long as GIR isn't making it."

Dib placed the glass of apple juice he brought back in front of him. Zim took it. Apple juice reminded him of a drink he loved on irk.

"Have you ever had a chocolate sundae?"

Zim looked up at him from his drink like he was crazy.

"Sunday? It's tuesday. How do you make it a chocolate day?"

"It's ice cream covered in chocolate sauce. I ordered one for myself but you can have it if you like it." Zim didn't understand how Dib would be so willing to give away food.

Sharing food was rare on irk. The taller irkens were given priority. Sometimes even they would have to starve and watch tallest Red and Purple eat when food was running low. With Zim's short size, he often went without. Not that he needed to eat much. His PAK was capable of using energy wisely so he could go months without food. Unfortunately, it didn't stop the hunger pains.

"Thank you, Dib-pet." he said with a purr.

"Oh Zim, you should try not to purr in public. Humans aren't supposed to purr."

Dib was grinning a lot. It seems that earlier events hadn't crushed his good mood.

A waiter with several plates of food came over and placed them in front of Zim.

Dib thanked him before turning to Zim.

"I wasn't sure what to get so I got a bit of everything. Anything you don't like, I'll eat."

It had cost quite a bit. Dib hoped the reaction would be worth it.

Zim studied all the plates. Bacon and egg sandwich, the 'chocolate Sunday' Dib-pet mentioned, some pancake like thing with strawberries, jam filled doughnuts. Zim's mouth watered. They had doughnuts on irk but he'd never had one.

Dib sat back and watched. He was afraid Zim might growl at him if he reached for anything. He was right too. Zim was possessive of food. If it wasn't for Dibs height, he probably wouldn't let him eat at all.

Zim started with the sub. He broke off a small piece and ate it. It wasn't bad. The meat wasn't killing him at least. It just wasn't sweet enough for his taste.

He pushed the plate over to Dib.

"I don't hate it but you can have it."

Dib didn't hesitate to dig in. He was starving.

"What are these?" Zim asked pointing to the pancake things.

"Those are the crepes I mentioned before."

Zim didn't have the best experience with pancakes. He hoped these would be a little different. He took a bite.

"Hey, these aren't bad!"

Dib was glad he liked at least one of the dishes. He'd be happy to eat the rest if Zim didn't want it.

"Why do you like sweet food so much?" it took a minute for Zim to answer.

"My PAK requires more energy than your body. Sugars are the best source. A lot of the energy is stored for emergencies though."

Dib was a little envious.

"I wish I could eat so much junk food. I'd either get fat or sick from so much sugar."

Zim smirked. He had plans for something that might allow just that.

"What if I could get you a PAK?" he asked, hoping he wouldn't reject the idea outright.

Dib had never considered that a possibility. He assumed he'd have to become part alien.

"I don't think my body would adjust well to irken technology."

"Well it wouldn't exactly be irken technology. Just inspired by it. It's all theoretical of course."

Dib wasn't really sure what to think. It would make him less human wouldn't it? But then again, people with artificial limbs and organs weren't considered less human. This wasn't that different. Just an extension of himself.

"Do you think it could work? How much would it effect me?" He was secretly hoping it meant getting spider legs.

"Well it would be similar to mine but you can choose features you want. The only major difference is you'd live indefinitely. Your body will still be easily damaged so you can still die from blood loss. You would be able to eat a lot and not gain weight." Dib wasn't sure how he felt about cheating death. He accepted his mortality.

"What are the risks?"

He trusted Zim but mistakes happen.

"Well, I'd need living human tissue to test it out. It doesn't have to be a live person!" he added quickly before Dib commented. "Just a sample. My computer should be able to replicate enough tissue for it to work."

Dib nodded. He was about to yell at Zim for a moment. He was glad the alien understood that human testing wasn't okay without consent.

Zim had finished of the crepes and moved on to the sundae. His face lit up when he tasted it. How could he not know something this amazing existed?! He noticed the human was watching him. He had long finished his meal and was waiting on Zim to try the rest. Zim felt a little guilty. He wanted both meals and he had already eaten part of Dibs sandwich.

He took one doughnut and pushed the other two towards Dib. He hoped the human understood how meaningful that gesture was for an irken. Dib was grateful for the extra food. It was worth it to see Zim's reaction to the ice cream.

Zim was tempted to forget the spoon and just use his tongue. That would draw a bit of attention though.

"Try dipping the doughnuts in the ice cream." Dib suggested. That's what kids do, after all. Dib even used to dip pizza in ice cream during their family dinners at bloatys.

Zim wasn't sure what to think. Snacks were not meant to be mixed but he trusted Dib enough to know it wouldn't cause any fatal reaction.

It was amazing. Zim moaned a little.

Dib laughed rather loudly at that. It couldn't be that good, could it? When Zim finished off the food Dib asked "Ready to go? Are you up for skool or should we go home?"

Zim smiled. "Let's go back to my base."


	16. Chapter 15: The plan

Chapter 15: The plan

"What do you want to do? We should start working out what to do about our situation." Dib trailed Zim to his front door. Zim made a face.

"Can't wait." he grumbled. "But yes, I suppose we should."

Dib wasn't really sure what they could do. They couldn't really fight their way through and letting them destroy earth wasn't an option.

Zim splayed out on the couch and turned his disguise off.

"Come, Dib-pet."

Zim was taking up the whole couch so he had to sit between his legs. Any other time, Dib might have felt awkward about that. He didn't worry himself too much as they had more pressing issues at hand.

"So, got any ideas?"

Zim looked thoughtful.

"Aside from finding a new planet to live on after this one is gone, no."

Dib sighed. He was worried he'd have to choose between Zim and the earth. It was an easy decision when Zim was the threat but since he was a victim this time, Dib was lost.

"Is there no way to negotiate?"

Zim shook his head.

"No, communication is still blocked. Unless they call first, I can't contact them."

Damn. Dib didn't think it would have worked anyway. If they really wanted to destroy Zim, talking them out of it wasn't an option.

Zim sat up and turned the TV on. It seemed his robot had been messing with it as the TV was playing only in Spanish.

"GIR! What did you do!?"

The little dog suited robot came running.

"I made them talk funny!"

He ran around, giggling like a lunatic. Talk about easy to entertain.

"Fix it. Now."

GIR ignored him and sat down in front of the TV.

"Last warning, GIR."

The robot looked at him with teary eyes and began screaming.

Zim was a little on edge. It was taking a lot of self control not to dump the SIR unit one of the many incinerators underground. He took a deep breath.

"Fine, go play in one of the labs."

Blue eyes turned red.

"Yes, sir!"

Once he was gone the alien fiddled with the remote. The language wasn't a big issue for him. He could just switch his translator over but then he wouldn't be able to communicate with Dib. That was an interesting thought. He wasn't sure how Dib would react if he started speaking another language. He'd have to add that to the list of ways to mess with the human. Dib looked around the room while waiting.

"Hey Zim, I've been meaning to ask. Is there a reason for the working sink and spa?"

Zim shrugged, still focusing on the remote.

"I thought you might like it."

"Me? But you rebuilt the base before we started talking. Unless.."

"I intended on befriending you from the beginning. Okay, I didn't exactly plan this part. I thought things might be like they were before, only this time you'd succeed in exposing me then take my base for yourself."

It was a little confusing for the scythe hair boy.

"You wanted to be exposed? Why? You know they'd probably autopsy you alive, right?"

Zim shrugged again.

"I had no purpose. I thought proving the existence of aliens to your species might have some significant effect on the world. It worked out well for you in the simulation." Dib ignored that last part. He didn't like thinking about the false life Zim created as a cruel way of getting the truth about the muffin incident.

"Well, I'm glad things worked out the way they did. My life sucked before you came back." Dib hadn't realised how much they had helped each other.

He reached over and hugged the alien. "Thank you."

Zim didn't say anything. He just enjoyed the feeling of being wanted for once. It was unusual but certainly not unpleasant.

"I wish I could stay here forever but someone needs to look out for Gaz." Dib knew their father would forget to leave money eventually. He didn't doubt Gaz could look after herself but he worried she'd spend all her money on games rather than food.

"If only you could clone yourself." Zim said, only half joking.

Suddenly an idea hit. Dib remembered when Zim had made a robot copy of him. It was enough to fool everyone else, even his sister.

"Zim! Can you make a robot copy of yourself and control it remotely?" Zim looked up.

"Yes, I'd need the parts though. What for?"

"Send it to your leaders in your place! If they think you're dead they won't bother you anymore!"

Zim looked hopeful for a moment but then his face fell.

"They'll find out it's not me when they dispose of the body."

Dib thought about that too.

"Not if we're the one disposing of it!"

Zim tilted his head. Dib could see he wasn't following.

"Your watch. We could disguise ourselves as the guards then brainwash the real guards into thinking they did their job."

Zim lit up. The plan sounded good. He just hoped his bad luck wouldn't ruin it. They'd be killed if they were caught.

"We would need a ship that won't be detected when we approach. And it could take over a month to get the supplies we'd need for an extra watch and robot. I think we could do it."

Zim smiled. He was glad he had Dib here. He might not have thought of that. But then again, without Dib it probably wouldn't matter.

"Dib...you're sure about this?"

Dib nodded. This was great. On top helping Zim, he'd get to board the Massive. It might be risky but the pay-off would be worth it.

"I want to help."


	17. Chapter 16: Father and son

Chapter 16: Father and son

Dib followed the alien down to the control room. Zim suspected the main reason the human was helping him was because he was excited to travel into space. Admittedly, Zim was too. He didn't like being confined to this dust ball planet. It would be good to get away with some intelligent company.

"Computer, load blueprints for modified Voot Cruiser."

The screens around the room flicked to life with various sketches and text Dib couldn't read. Zim settled into his chair and began typing.

"We should prepare ourselves for any variables." Zim commented. He had learned a few things from his past failures, mainly to always have a backup plan.

Dib nodded.

"I've been thinking. You said that the Tallest will probably go for public execution. What if they go for another trial instead? No offence Zim, but they aren't the smartest lot."

Zim hadn't considered that. Dib was right about them not being the brightest. That said a lot about him too. He was foolish enough to believe they cared about him and they hadn't even tried to hide their contempt.

"If they go for the trial then they will notice that my PAK isn't real. I think it could be possible to make a copy of my memories and implement them to the fake PAK. Though, even if they find me innocent of blowing up the planets, I'd still be erased for things that have happened since returning to earth." Zim looked a little ashamed. Relationships were non-existent in a race of invaders capable of artificial creation. No matter how innocent he was of the accused crimes, he'd be destroyed for going against the nature of his species.

Dib would have commented on how appalling that was but he knew the human race really wasn't much better. In some places people are still executed for having a different opinion. He didn't want to talk about the shortcomings of their species so he changed the subject.

"Well in worst case scenario, we can lock your leaders in a closet and take their place."

Zim chuckled. He had long dreamed of being Tallest. This could be his only chance.

"Let's call that plan B."

Zim span around in his chair to face Dib.

"Dib-pet, my Voot Cruiser is capable of bypassing irken radars but it is only a one seat vehicle. Depending on when we intercept the Massive, we could be flying for a month..."

Dib lay on the ground and stretched out.

"I don't mind the tight fit." he joked. "It's the lack of bathroom I'm bothered by."

Zim growled, playfully. "Stupid smelly humans."

He turned back to the screen.

"I can get us a larger ship from passerby's but it's a gamble. We could end up with anything."

Dib shrugged. He wasn't too concerned over the kind of ship they got. As long as it had food, water and a bathroom, he'd manage.

Before he could reply, a vibrating phone interrupted. Dib was a little surprised he even had reception this far underground.

"Hello? No I'm not. I'm at a friends place."

Zim looked at him. He wasn't very familiar with the concept of mobile phones and thought Dib might have started talking to himself.

Dib held up a finger to stop Zim from talking.

"Okay, okay, I'll be right home, dad."

Zim couldn't read the expression on the humans face.

"Is everything okay?"

Dib frowned a little.

"I'm not sure. I was just told to be home right away. Whatever it is, I don't think it's good."

"Should Zim come with you?"

Dib stood up and brushed himself off.

"I don't think so. Dad sounded pretty pissed."

Zim hesitated. An angry parental unit was something he didn't really understand. He thought he should be nearby just in case but Dib was smart. He could handle whatever it was. Eventually he nodded.

"Very well, I shall keep working."

Dib lent over and gave his companion a quick peck on the cheek.

"I'll see you later." he said with a little uncertainty as he headed for the exit.

...

Dib was nervous. He rarely had contact with his father. There's no way he'd be called home just for missing a few days of skool. It had to be more important then that, he was sure of it. He paced anxiously on the front lawn for a few moments before going in.

"I'm home, dad."

Professor Membrane stepped out from the kitchen.

"Hello, son. Why don't you take a seat."

The professor towered over the younger boy. Honestly, Dib hardly knew the man. He was rarely home and they had nothing in common. That made him quite intimidating at times like this. Dib reluctantly sat down.

"Now son, I think it's time we talk about your future."

Dib looked down at the table and waited, not sure what he was expected to say.

"I expect you have given up your ridiculous paranormal studies?"

"Not exactly. I'm still interested. In fact, I'm going on a research trip soon."

'Research trip' might not be the best term for it but he'd certainly learn a lot about alien society.

"Now, now, Its time we put an end to this foolish game and get you into REAL Science!" his father struck a dramatic pose. He always got over enthusiastic when it came to his profession.

"Sorry dad, I'm really not interested. Real science is just so... boring."

"Come now my poor insane boy, I didn't raise you like that."

Dib was tempted to retort with 'you didn't raise me at all' but thought better of it.

"I like discovering the unknown."

"There are plenty of unknown things in real science waiting to discovered by you!"

Dib was getting frustrated. Why couldn't he just accept that he wanted to follow his own path?

"I'm sticking to my chosen career."

Professor Membrane lent over the table.

"I know that REAL science is the right path for you."

Dib rolled his eyes. Here we go.

"How do you figure that?"

"When I was your age, I knew I wanted to be a scientist. Now I don't know where you picked your 'para-science' but it wasn't from me."

"I'm not you, dad."

The professor looked at him sternly.

"My son, you are 95% me."

Dib wasn't following.

"But..."

He wasn't sure what to say.

"That's right, son! You are created from my genetic material. I couldn't risk contaminating my genetics by mixing them the traditional way! I needed someone to follow in my footsteps. That is why I designed you."

The scythe haired boy was speechless.

"...but...wait, what about the other 5 percent? And Gaz?!"

Dib was glad he was sitting down.

"The other 5% was left over from the last experiment."

The professor shook his head.

"That poor, poor, mutant."

He paused for a moment. Dib was afraid to ask.

"Gaz was created several months after you. However, she was a mix of my DNA and a female scientist that worked with me. She is just like a normal child genetic wise."

"Implying I'm not normal..."

Dib wasn't too shocked. He knew he wasn't exactly normal but it was a lot to take in.

"Perhaps this para-science nonsense is from that 5%..." he murmured to himself.

Dib put his head on the desk.

"I'm going to my room."

"Good idea, boy. Best think about what science field you want to study."

Dib wasn't listening anymore. He needed to lay down.

* * *

A/N: I know Dib being a clone is overdone but I've taken all the unfinished episodes as canon. I don't believe the episode ever had a script (can someone confirm?) but I remember hearing the idea of him being a clone would have been a season 3 episode. This is just how I assume the conversation would have went.


	18. Chapter 17: Explanation

Chapter 17: Explanation

Zim hadn't seen Dib in several days. He had knocked on the window of the boys house several times but got no response. The one time he tried the front door, Gaz had answered in a particularly bad mood. He got no answers and had been afraid to try again. Gaz was scary and the fact Gaz wasn't concerned had worried him even more.

The alien paced the living room. His little robot was making bacon cakes in the kitchen for dinner. Zim didn't even know how GIR got bacon in the first place. With a sigh, Zim sat down.

He wondered if any of the old cameras he'd hidden around Dibs house were still active. While Zim didn't completely understand boundaries, he didn't think the human would be too pleased about being spied on. Then again, Dib could be in trouble. He hadn't turned up for skool and either was never home or ignored him when he knocked. Surely, Dib would understand.

"Computer, are any cameras in Dibs base active?"

"Affirmative. 2 of 8 cameras are still live."

Well better than nothing. Zim headed down to computer room.

"Alright, show live camera feeds."

Two screens flicked to life. One camera appeared to be in the living room, the other in Dib's bedroom.

Gaz was standing in the doorway. Unfortunately there was no sound but Zim could tell she was yelling. After a moment of_ nail biting_ suspense, she stormed out of the room, slamming the door behind her. Dib was left sitting on the floor with his laptop. When Gaz left he dropped his head to his knees.

Zim didn't need to be great at reading body language to tell he was miserable. About what, he wasn't sure. It must be related to that phone call the other day when Dib had been reluctant to leave. He knew he should have gone with him.

Gaz had gone back to the living room to watch TV. Professor Membrane didn't appear to be around, though he could be in the basement. Zim wondered if it would be safe to try the front door or go straight to the window. Now that he knew Dib was there, he was prepared to wait all night for answers. Zim hated not knowing things. If need be, he could hack into the boys laptop and send a message directly to him. Hopefully it wouldn't come to that.

"GIR! We are going out!"

An approving squeak came from somewhere above. Zim looked up.

"You better not be in the garbage shoot again!"

"It's not me! The bacon got stuck!" the reply came. Zims antenna twitched. He didn't bother asking.

GIR caught up by the time the alien got to the front door. The robot was covered in bacon grease.

"Ugh, GIR, you're disgusting! Stay here and clean off... Just don't ..touch anything." Zim shuddered.

He'd have to deal with the mess later.

It was completely dark by the time he got to the humans house. He decided against the front door. Gaz had already proven to be in a bad mood. Another beating from the pigmeat-smelly was the last thing he needed. Since GIR wasn't there he used his spider legs to climb up to the window.

"Dib, I know you're in there!"

He knocked several times and waited.

After a few minutes with no reply he followed it up with "Don't make me blow up the window."

He hadn't been serious but he could just hear Dib's sigh of defeat. The window opened.

"Hi, Zim." Dib said with a faint smile.

"Dib-human, why have you been ignoring the mighty ZIM!"

Zim climbed in and hovered over Dib. The spider legs were a good intimidation tactic, though they were unnecessary in this situation. Dib wasn't phased. He sat down on the edge of the bed.

"Sorry, I've just been.. thinking."

Zim dropped to the floor.

"About what?"

"Zim, you don't have parents do you?" The human asked as casually as he could.

"Hmmm?" Where was he going with this.

"Aside from the roboparents, no. Irkens are created, not bred."

Dib looked up.

"Well that's something we have in common." Zim could detect the bitterness in his voice. Surely being more like his mighty self was a good thing, even if he didn't know what Dib meant.

"What happened with your parental unit, human?" Zim sat down next to him.

"Turns out he isn't really my 'parental unit'. He's me. I never even had a mother."

Zim stared blankly.

"...huh?"

"I'm a clone, Zim."

A clone? If humans can clone, why did they still breed? He didn't understand.

"So you are genetically superior to other humans?"

Dib frowned. He didn't see anything good about his origins. His entire existence was unnatural.

"How does that make me superior, exactly?"

Did the human not see how GREAT this was?

"Cloning brings you one step closer to being a superior race. All the advanced races saw the benefits of cloning and use it as the main way to further their species."

"Well I guess it's better than laying eggs in someone's chest." Dib joked. Eggs in someone's chest? Only small, parasitic races used that method of reproducing. Come to think of it, the irken empire had wiped them all out. Zim didn't understand his humour or reference so he changed to topic.

"So this is why you've been moping for days?"

"I wasn't moping! I was just thinking which is hard to do around you!" Dib yelled, getting rather defensive.

Zim wasn't sure if it was a compliment or insult.

"So you're done with 'thinking' now?"

Dib shrugged. He wasn't overly happy about it but he could accept it.

"I guess."

"Good, because I got us a ship big enough for the both of us. Be grateful, human. I traded my best weapons for it."

Dib grinned. At least that was something to look forward to.

"That's great! What about the robot?"

"I've got most the parts. I'll need to order some more though."

Things were going well. The further away from earth they could intercept the massive, the better.

"I still have a question. Will I be able to breathe in space?"

Zim looked at him like he was stupid.

"All spacecraft's use recycled oxygen. At no point will we be leaving the ship so it's not an issue unless we crash... or lose power." Dib was a little worried by that. He trusted Zims piloting abilities but accidents happen and if things went wrong they were likely to be shot down.

"Shouldn't we have a backup source? I don't fancy dying of asphyxiation."

Again, Zim stared blankly.

"As-fixy-what?" Dib rolled his eyes.

"Asphyxiation. Lack of oxygen."

"Oh, yes. Very well. I'll find you a suit with built in atmospheric controls." Dib wasn't really sure what that was but he went with it.

"Fantastic. Also, I haven't missed too much at skool have I?"

Zim chuckled.

"Nothing important. I've been taking notes for you in history though."

Dib looked surprised.

"Really?"

"Of course. You really think that poorly of me Dib-stink?"

Dib looked up.

"Oh no. I just didn't expect it. Thanks Zim. I owe you."

Zim laughed like a maniac. The human owed him. He'd have to find some way to use it to his advantage. Dib looked a little nervous. Zim was acting more and more like his old self. He put it down to Zims damaged PAK causing mood (and personality) swings but he couldn't shake the feeling something more sinister was going on.

"Tomorrow's Saturday. Want to go somewhere?" Dib said, changing the subject. Again, Zims personality changed dramatically.

"Of course, Dib-pet. Where did you want to go?"

Dib thought for a moment. "The zoo?"

Zoo? Irken 'zoos' consisted of abused specimens from conquered races. What could earth zoos possibly be like?

"Sure..." Zim replied with a little uncertainty. He wanted to get back to the base and make sure this 'zoo' wouldn't be dangerous for him.

"Zim must leave. Where are we to meet up?"

Dib smiled. He hadn't been to the zoo since he stopped the chupacabra eating the petting goats when he was 12.

"Meet at the bus stop near the Hi-Skool at 10."

Tomorrow would be fun.


	19. Chapter 18: The Zoo

Chapter 18: The Zoo

It was a wonderful, clear morning. The warm weather meant the animals would be active. Dib didn't want to bore the alien with only glimpses of sleeping specimens. While Dib much preferred studying paranormal subjects, he did find animal biology fascinating. The survival tactics of some species were amazing. He hoped to show Zim that even primitive life was worthy of existence.

Zim got there only several minutes before the bus was due to arrive. Dib sighed in relief. He didn't want to wait an hour for the next one.

"Hello, Dib." he purred.

"Hey, Zim. Are you ready?" Dib greeted him. Zim looked uneasy.

"These 'zoos' consist of many dangerous life forms, do they not?"

Dib moved over so Zim could sit down.

"Yeah, I guess. They are behind fences though. Just don't do anything stupid like stick your arm through it."

"Hmph." Zim thought this would have been a great place to dispose of humans who interfered with his mission. Thankfully, he didn't know about it years ago or Dib might have been eaten.

Zim's thoughts were interrupted by the bus pulling up.

They took the seats by the front and continued talking.

"Do they have food at this place?" Zim wasn't going to have fun if he was hungry.

"Yeah. Don't expect much though. Food isn't really the focus."

He'd never eaten at the zoo but he'd seen some snack stands.

The zoo wasn't too far but the bus took the long route there.

Half an hour later, they got to their stop. Luckily enough, there was no waiting line. Dib payed for their tickets and took Zim straight to the nearest snack stand. A hungry alien was the last thing he needed today.

"What do you want?" The boy asked Zim. There wasn't much of a selection. Only a few things on the menu would be edible for the alien.

"Choose for me, earthling." Zim crossed him arms and turned away, examining his surroundings.

Dib grabbed some chocolate and hot chips. He wasn't sure Zim would enjoy them but he wouldn't mind eating them himself.

"Here Zim. I don't know if you'll like them but they shouldn't kill you."

The alien shrugged and followed him to the nearest table.

"They're alright." He said, taking a bite of a chip.

The table was right by an enclosure full of small mouse-like animals standing on two legs.

"Dib-pet, what are those things?"

The irken was glaring at them. Dib chuckled heartily.

"Meerkats. They come from Africa."

Dib took a couple of the chips which caused the alien to turn his glare to him.

Zim ate the rest of the food quickly so that Dib wouldn't get any. He could get his own. Dib wasn't too bothered about the irkens food aggression. He had breakfast right before he left.

"Let's go to the butterfly house next." Dib had fond memories of that place. It was one family outing that had left Gaz in a good mood. Of course, she never admitted it. By the look on Zims face he could tell that wouldn't be the case for the alien.

"Butterflies? You want to kill me with butterflies?" Zim looked disgusted. The boy wasn't sure if he should be amused or annoyed by Zims ignorance.

"They're harmless. Are you afraid of them?"

"You dare insult ZIM?! Zim is afraid of NOTHING!" He marched off in the opposite direction.

"It's this way!" Dib called out after him. The alien stopped, looking unphasedby his mistake.

"I knew that. This zoo was your idea, you can endanger yourself first."

Dib shrugged and started walking. The irkens strange behavior didn't ruin his excitement.

Zim reluctantly followed.

"Filthy flying beasts." Zim muttered.

"Relax. They can't hurt you."

Zim tried his best to look brave in front of his ex-enemy but butterflies existed on irk too. The butterflies he was familiar with, however, were more the 'indestructible-spray-acid-in-your-face' kind. He assumed these butterflies were just as dangerous.

Dib pushed open the door. He felt Zim press a little closer to him. Dib wasn't sure if Zim wanted to protect him or himself. They stayed behind the plastic curtain for a minute. Zims eyes widened when he saw just how many of the beasts there were.

"See? They are pretty." Dib grinned and pushed past the clear barrier. Zim was horrified as several butterflies landed on the human.

Why was he so calm? Perhaps that was the key to taming them.

Zim took a deep breath and followed. These insects were certainly smaller than he was used to. Dib turned back to him.

"What are you scared of? They won't hurt you."

Zim jumped back as a butterfly flew by him.

"Ugh! I don't want acid in my face."

Dib laughed.

"Acid? A lot of insects can spray acid but butterflies aren't one of them. They do drink blood of dead animals when there isn't much water though."

"These monster drink your blood candies but you still like them?"

Zim was confused. Shouldn't the human be running for his life?

"Well yes. But I'm not a dead animal and it's only when conditions get bad."

Dib found Zim's fear of the colorful insects cute.

"So... They aren't dangerous? Why didn't you say that sooner, earthling." Zim laughed like this was some kind of victory until a butterfly landed on his face.

"I said it a few times actually..."

"YOU'RE LYING!"

With that brilliant comeback, Zim marched forward to examine the monsters.

A large green and gold one landed on the ground. Zim tried to chase it away but it didn't move. Maybe it wanted to get stepped on.

"Dib-thing, why does this one not fly away?"

Dib came up beside him and picked it up. It attempted to fly but fell back to the earth. Dib sighed.

"It's dying, I guess. Butterflies only live for a few weeks. Even less if something touches it's wings. They're fragile." Zim was amazed. Such a short lifespan was hard to comprehend for the immortal alien.

"What is the point of living if they die so soon?"

The human shrugged.

"Everything has a purpose in nature. And technically they live longer than that. They just spend most of their lives as caterpillars."

Dib pointed to the larvae covering the bushes around them.

"These disgusting worm-beasts look nothing like the flying things." Zim commented as he got a closer look.

"That's the point. A lot of insects look nothing like the adult stages."

Zim went with it. Earth life was weird.

"Is there anything in particular you want to see next?"

Dib wasn't sure the alien knew the names of any animals besides the ones he experimented on or learned about at skool.

"Those big fanged beasts."

Helpful. He just described every large predator ever.

"Okay, what do they look like? A lot of animals are big and have fangs."

Zim gave a blank stare.

"..Uhh... They have fur?"

Dib was beginning to think Zim didn't have anything in mind and was just hoping something matched that description.

"Alright, well luckily all the large predators are close to each other."

Dib led him through the butterfly house and to the big cat enclosures. Zim didn't seem too impressed.

"They're just big kitties. They don't look dangerous."

Dib just hoped Zim didn't try to prove his theory and climb the fence. That wouldn't end well. He decided he'd show the alien some nature documentaries one day.

The polar bears and sharks seem to interest Zim more. Unlike the cats concealed weapons, their teeth and claws were more obvious.

They ended up spending most the day looking at predators. Dib wasn't surprised. He knew from the start that Zim would be bored by the animals that do nothing but graze.

"Your earth species are tame compared to irks." _Very _tame.

"What are animals like there?"

Dib had often wondered about the other life forms from Zims planet.

"Deadly. Most of them can spray acid or breathe fire."

"Really? Let's take that off the list of planets I want to visit."

Dib joked. It made sense though. Evolving along side such a vicious race, they'd need good defences or they'd go extinct. It certainly wasn't a good place for a fragile human to be.

Dib heard thunder in the distance. When had the sky got so dark?

"We should go. It's going to rain soon."

Zim grimaced. He hadn't bathed in paste this morning since it had been so clear.

They headed back to the bus stop.

Damn, it really didn't look like he'd get home unscathed. It was starting to drizzle. Zim pressed himself as far as he could into the bus shelter. He cursed himself for not being more cautious about the weather. Dib looked at him worriedly. If it was still raining when they got to their stop they'd have to walk home in the rain. Zim would never let him forget that.

The rain had only gotten heavier by the time the bus turned up. Dib removed his coat and threw it over Zims head. At least they could get on the bus with no burns.

"Thank you, Dib-pet." he held the coat out once they took their seats.

"Hold on to it. You might need it when we get off." Dib was a little cold but he'd never admit it. He felt very exposed without the coat though since he never went in public without it. He hoped Zim wouldn't notice his discomfort.

Zim did notice that the human was pressing closer to him than usual though.

"Are you feeling okay?"

He looked concerned by Dib's strange behavior.

"Yeah, don't worry about me. I just doubt we can get back to your base in the rain."

That was true. The rain posed a major issue. Dib's coat helped but water would seep through eventually.

They'd need closer shelter. The rain did seem to be easing off at least.

They sat in comfortable silence for the remainder of the trip.

When the bus pulled up, Zim leapt for the cover of the bus shelter while Dib muttered a quick 'thank you' to the driver.

"Now what?" Zim growled. He could call GIR to bring the Voot Cruiser but didn't want to risk the robot crashing it.

"The rain seems to be stopping. If we hurry we could get back to your base before it picks up again." Dib didn't want to put the alien at risk. If they stayed put and the rain got heavy again, the little shelter they had would be no good. Zim nodded his agreement.

The two boys hurried down the street. While the rain was light, the wind was freezing the humans damp skin. Dib did his best to ignore it but it was slowing him down and making it hard to breathe. Eventually he had to stop.

"Keep going, Zim. I'll catch up."

Zim stood by him. He'd seen the boy run much faster and over longer distances in the past. Surely the boy hadn't got this out of shape in his absence.

"Dib..are you okay?" Zim asked with genuine concern.

"Yeah...I just.. need a..a break." He panted.

Zim began to sizzle where the coat was pressed against his skin. He hissed.

"Go!" Dib ordered. Any other time, Zim would have ignored him out of spite. He didn't like taking orders from a human but he would soon be in a lot of pain if he waited.

"Okay.."

Zim took off. If Dib didn't catch up he decided he'd fly the Voot cruiser himself and pick him up. It wasn't long before his house was in sight.

As soon a he entered the front door he threw the now soaked coat to the floor and turned off the hologram to examine his injuries.

Only minor burns.

The skin was raw and tender but with his quick healing that would be gone within a few hours.

"Computer, wash and dry Dib's coat."

Zim ordered as he made his way to the attic. He heard the computer groan.

"Yes, sir." it responded in a bored tone. Maybe giving the computer a personality wasn't the best idea. At least it did what it was told.

Zim jumped into the small ship that had first brought him to this planet. He started keeping it in the attic again after wild animals began using it as a marking post. _Filthy beasts_.

Zim turned on the cloaking field and headed down the path he'd taken.

He was expecting to meet Dib halfway from where he'd left him but the human was no where to be seen. He parked at the spot he'd last seen him. Since the rain had stopped completely he got out.

"Dib-pet?" the green boy called. He was glad there was no one around. He'd completely forgotten to turn his disguise back on and the cloaking shield only extended a short distance. An alien appearing out of thin air was bound to draw attention.

He heard a groan from the bushes.

Zim could just make out a curled up figure.

"Dib! What happened!?"

Dib sat up, shaking badly.

"I felt sick and needed to lie down." Zim helped him to his feet.

"I brought the ship. I'll take you back to the base."

Dib was having trouble speaking so he nodded and stumbled forward. The ship materialised as soon as he past the invisible barrier. Zim wasn't kidding when he said it would be a tight fit.

Zim climbed in first and helped Dib settle beside him. Before Zim had even lifted off the ground the human had passed out in his lap.


End file.
